Rusted.From.The.Rain

i bought the green day tix. i cant believe im going for their concert.. its awesome.. i was browsing thru top movies of 2010.. im so watching most of it man.. even if i have to watch it myself.. im crazy i know but it suck to be me.lol..

u guys gotta listen to barlowgirl.. this band sound so great and i feel relax when i hear them.. =)

gotta head to bed early but before that i shall read vamp book first.. good night!!

Zatt Lefebvre.

what do i really wish for the year 2010? actually i want my frens to stay happy and dun leave me cause im a vulnerable person… i need my frens or else i dun think i can even live.. i want my parents to have a gd health and stay strong always.. my sis and her family to be  together always…

i hope things would be differently in 2010. a whole new experiences.. a gd one. not a bad.. i cant believe that im gonna turn 22 soon.. and loads i have not complete.. its gonna be an eventful yr cause loads i needed to do… but i think life will always be up and down no matter what yr it is.. im gonna pull thru…

its going to be diff w/o u ard.. today seems to be the last time im gonna have fun and crap with ya.. im glad i did that.. just hope u find great things there.. i believe that.. u r fun to be with and we shall hang out soon kk?

alvin and the chipmunks are cute. theodore my fav. haha..

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010 EVERYONE!!! LOVE YOU ALL!!=)

Zatt Lefebvre.

i wanna be my emo self again… i miss my old self. i dunno why it seems im very comfortable with my old self. its sill of me i know but thats when i found my true self. hmmmm.. think deep maybe i have really lost my true self.

u now what i feel happy whenever i talk to him…i can even forget my unhappiness when im with him… can it be the same? i know im going to miss him when he’s gone.. haiz.. i wanna tell him how i feel but sometime its best to keep the way it is cause  he and are better off as frens.  hmmm … i shall stay firm with my decisions for now…

anyways, i made a bet with someome so that someone must hold to his word!! hahaha but i know he will twist things and make it to his advantage… hahahah… irritatin guy… but thanks lah dude!!

to the person i met today,

sorry that i was not comfortable.. i was really not comfortable with you. we can just remains frens. i have fears that i cant overcome. especially with men that im afraid.. past experiences has make me afraid to be close to a guy that i just knew..its a phobia that i cant overcome. that make it harder to make frens. im sorry again. if u dun wanna talk to me again, i understand. thanks for today.

Zatt Lefebvre.

back to training tmr. i was skeptical bout it cause i dun feel like going anywhere.. but once im there tmr i will be alright.. weird right? hahaha.. left 3 more days, and im done. just left the exam.. i guess…

its been weeks since i last saw him.. i kinda miss him.. *cough*cough* lol!

im hook to house of night books. and true blood series.. hahah..

Zatt Lefebvre.

i finally did 2 piercing on my left ear.. lol!!! it hurts… but it got better after a while… i watched sherlock holmes.. its gd and funny.. jude law was very cool n funny.. haiz… suppose to work tmr but i got ph since not much patient ard.. so they gave me ph… hmmm… i nearly fight with that person..

i got angry with you for ntg… thank god u clarified urself..

Zatt Lefebvre.

i’ve chosen this path for myself.. i rather be in my  fantasy land than be in the reality.. thats when i will be happy… ppl may call me crazy but i m stating the truth.. music is my life. i have great friends… but im 21 yet i cant find the right one… only in my fantasy that i can drew up my right one..

another thing that can make me happy is sebastien.. i know i know.. he doesn’t even know me.. but when he sings, i feel his gentleness.. and it gives me the chill.. and causee me tachycardia… haiz..

i realis when i get to know guys, they are either too old, or the attitude was too much i could take or they are too open minded.. i sound like i very choosy but truthfully i have no confidence… in my head, things go perfectly but in reality  it turned out bad.. i wish i was normal.. i wish i know things.. i wish i wish…

im just emo.. but i was already one …

im still waiting for you. waiting still..

Zatt Lefebvre.

now i know what its getting harder to learn new things… guess gotta take things slowly..

hope i can pass the exam.. pray hard for me… *hoping*

Zatt Lefebvre.

i passed my practical exam!!! wheee!! i guess the lecturer was a gd one… but i gotta exposed myself.. so weird lah.. seriously but im happy that i passed… after that i head to vivo and got something for my dearest jiayu… its her bday … i hope she will like it.. =)

monday i got training leave again…. it felt great not to be in the ward.. as in i dun feel stress facing the relatives and even patients… i dunno recently feel so lazy to work… hmmm.. not that i wanna quit the job.. the job is gd.. its just.. hmmm… tmr is afternoon shift.. i dun mind actually and sunday im morning.. hopefully jiayu can meet me… im not sure whether she’s back from hongkong. hmmm…

i was thinking bout him. my spidey.. i know AGAIN??? HAHAH..  i cant help it seriously… i am who i am..

hopefully i get to see someone tmr. if not… maybe in another life then…

Zatt Lefebvre.